It’s not the traditional spot we were looking for, but it’s our thing. Sometime once a week, sometimes up to three times a week. The motel we frequent isn’t quaint or ritzy, it’s just someplace we go to so that we can be there for each other.
I know he has a lot of feelings for me; more than I am capable of reciprocating, or maybe I am, I’m just not voicing them like he is.
He’s a great guy, very intuitive to my needs and wants, but I just can’t let that wall come down to say that I have feelings for him; which I know I do. But that could be because of the three-year sex/relationship drought he just replenished me from:
THE SEX IS FUCKING AWESOME! (pun intended)
I say to myself each time, “This will be the last time!” With all intend of never meeting him in our spot again. Sure, we have real conversations about all types of things:
- Society issues
- Personal goals/plans
- Daily issues (good, bad, indifferent)
- Family life
- Work life
How do I not appreciate that each day he tries to make me feel special/good and I do my best to reciprocate the same.
When I am in our spot, I want to cut us off from the world and not think about how we aren’t really a couple, just fuck buddies. I have grown accustomed to lying next to him that it annoys me to sleep in my own bed, ALONE.
Why couldn’t we have met years ago, before all the nightmarish shit that has happened to me?
Our spot is so wrong, but feels so unbelievably right. I am dead wrong for wanting his presence with me all the time. He hasn’t looked at me negatively in the least after knowing all of the negative shit I have done. I am hardcore most times because I have to be and he seems to be softening some of my hard edges. That’s something I get defensive about with him and he knows damn well that he is chiseling away at my wall.
Our spot doesn’t have a lot of space, but it doesn’t need to have a great deal of it.
I love the way the tip of his cock hits the back of my throat and to hear his moan when I take it all in. His looks aren’t exactly GQ, just as mine aren’t Cosmopolitan style. We are just ordinary people, that have serious wants and needs. He doesn’t have a singing voice, but he serenades me with the right words that tug at my heart.
I don’t know where I end up with this dude. He’s aware of the lifestyle I wish to live and is very interested in it, not trying to shoot me down becasue of it.
His spot, my spot, our spot has plenty of space in it.